Cet obscur objet du désir

You told me that you had seen too much of the world to see the world inside me. And yet, perhaps the worlds you hadn't found yet were filled with what you were searching for.

I have educated myself to behave - and to respect the wishes and covets of others in such a way as to keep them happy and safe. However, respecting the dreams of others to the extent of disregarding your own is something I would not recommend. It leads to a heartache that bites more into you than fulfilled wishes. It so comes that that we store past relations that did not work or brought us pain in secret little drawers in our hearts and minds. The random occurrence of memories then intensifies gradually a feeling of indifference we choose over pain or anything else, because it soothes us. Sometimes it is not indifference, it is hate, or violence, or revenge... but I am quite sure of the non-usefulness of such emotions. Besides consuming us, they only bring negativity, not comfort, which is what our souls are seeking...

Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And then one fine morning—So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.
(F Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby)